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Loading...By Karen Meager, Monkey Puzzle Training
Economic challenges, digital transformation, sustainability and inclusiveness, COVID and remote working are just a few of the issues that have seen our working lives change over the past decade; work has changed a lot. Businesses have had to adapt rapidly.
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A 2012 Monkey Puzzle Training survey (of over 60 UK and European business leaders) set out to discover what kinds of people were in leadership roles and what they enjoyed and found challenging in those roles. The same survey was rerun in 2020.
Very little had moved in terms of day-to-day experiences (managing time and dealing with difficult behavior remained among the biggest challenges) but what had changed were the topics and expectations business leaders have to deal with. Now, along with strategic thinking and making business decisions, modern leaders are faced with managing mental health, wellbeing, psychological safety, diversity, and inclusion. There is an ever-growing list of expectations of leaders that is exhausting and (arguably) unrealistic for any single person; They are required to be strong yet vulnerable, provide both autonomy and protection, and to be clear and straightforward yet also understand complex nuances.
And then there was a pandemic
Since we ran the research, we’ve all experienced a couple of years of upheaval that included the existential threat to some businesses brought about by lockdowns, managing (decreasing) furlough payments to keep companies from collapsing, circumstances overtaking the best of efforts to survive, and working from home in slippers becoming a shot in the arm for some and a nightmare for others. Unprecedented changes in the history of modern working.
Now that people are returning to the office, we are seeing an explosion of pent-up grievances. These can be harder to spot and deal with from a leadership perspective. But rather than avoid these issues, leaders will need to become really good at facing up to hard conversations, to mediating, and, where necessary, to facilitating exits.
Burnout
Dealing with your own stress, the interpersonal issues of colleagues, and the already exhausting list of expectations leaves many leaders stuck struggling to meet new demands while still trying to master the essentials. It’s no surprise, then, that burnout rates in leadership are reaching alarming levels and many people are seeking less stressful roles.
But without good leaders, the world stops working properly. We need people who are able to find a balance between these qualities and expectations while managing to motivate and inspire people.
Rather than attempting to create super-humans capable of managing everything perfectly, how about considering the things you can personally implement that will help you become a better leader:
1. Being everything to everyone isn’t possible
It’s unlikely you will ever be the leader everyone wants you to be, so let go of your perfectionist tendencies and get to know your limitations.
Often, leaders are told to iron out and expand their limitations. Yet, this will often leave you giving up developing your strengths by overextending yourself into a weakness. There’s simply not enough time to focus on both. Instead, it is usually possible to find ways around your limitations. If you’re not great at organization, you can find support from a deputy, for example.
Start by finding your unique advantage ─ the place where the Venn diagram of strengths, business needs, and personal enjoyment overlap. Anything else, you can either work on improving or find someone else to plug the gaps.
2. There is always room for improvement
Once you know your unique strengths and values, and have identified your weak spots, identify and work on one area you would like to improve.
It is useful and important to use feedback to work on self-development. You may think that your organization skills are weak but perhaps your team doesn’t need organizing as much as they need attention to detail.
Elicit feedback from a variety of trusted sources and look for themes and perspectives on your behavior. However, be wary of unsolicited feedback as there can often be an agenda attached.
Of course, getting honest and trustworthy feedback without hitting all your hot buttons is difficult. People you manage are unlikely to give you particularly negative feedback, while those in senior management may be too far removed from the day-to-day.
A third-party training provider or a coach can be invaluable for this activity. They can gain honest feedback, filter out unhelpful content, and present key themes in a way that avoids hot buttons.
3. Make realistic goals for your leadership development
Once you know what gaps there are to fill, you can set realistic goals and work towards them. It is always better to plug holes and work step by step rather than trying to leap up a staircase in one go.
Avoid setting any goals that your brain won’t accept. If it’s not relevant to you or your role or doesn’t fit your personality, this will make it impossible to achieve a goal. You should also try to avoid getting distracted by the ‘next big thing’ – fads fade but good leadership, as our survey shows, stands the test of time.
Once you have identified relevant and useful goals, begin practicing them in a safe environment where you can risk getting them wrong. You’re unlikely to be great at first, so it is unwise to practice your new skill when there is a lot on the line. Applying new strategic thinking skills to a multi-million-pound pitch is risky and could lead to a major setback. Instead, try applying it to your internal strategy first and get feedback from the wider team to help you improve.
4. Get support from a coach or mentor
Coaches and/or mentors can be an invaluable resource. Not only can they provide a different perspective, but they can also be a compassionate ear to express your own fears and frustrations.
The most important thing is to find someone who is qualified. Coaching is not a regulated profession, so look for someone who is registered with a professional body and has good training. Coaching is about combining experience with a specific skillset and not everyone is suited to it.
It may also be useful to ask whether they are appropriate to your profession. Needing to explain the context and industry to your coach can be a massive waste of time. So, some background technical knowledge can be extremely useful.
However, the absolute key thing to look for in a coach is someone with whom you feel like you could share your weaknesses and whom you trust. Needy, emotionally dysfunctional coaches are a nightmare as the work becomes more about keeping them happy than having your own needs met. Coaches aren’t there to be liked; coaches are there to help you improve.
Mentoring is often more specific to your job. Mentors are often found in your network and/or organization (e.g., peer mentoring, swapping skills and experience). The benefit of mentors from your network or organization is that it takes away hierarchy, making it work well for senior leaders or anyone under a strict NDA.
5. Think about and stick to boundaries
While leaders are expected to manage the (increasingly explicit) boundaries of colleagues, it is not always seen as okay to make a case for your own wellbeing. Leaders are expected to be ‘always on’ and available to both employees and senior management.
As such, it is important to get used to saying ‘no’ without saying ‘no’ – being unavailable without making a big deal about it. When the business is fast-paced and mission-led, your case for your own wellbeing can go unheard, but you can still manage it for yourself.
Start by defining your boundaries, perhaps committing yourself to stepping away from your phone in the evenings or making a promise to yourself not to work late at least two nights a week.
Once you have identified your own boundaries, stick to them. You don’t need to broadcast that you will be unavailable after seven o’clock, simply be unavailable. People will get used to these quiet boundaries without them being made explicit.
On the flip side, when you’re all in, be all in. Work hard, develop skills, overcome weaknesses, and find a style of leadership that emphasizes your unique talents. Just don’t be a leader all the time. Make time for yourself so that you avoid burning out!
Karen Meager is a co-founder of Monkey Puzzle Training, a leadership development and organizational design consultancy. Monkey Puzzle works with business leaders to help align teams, support innovation, build sustainable organizations and develop exceptional people who are better able to achieve results – giving leaders more time to do what they do best.
The views and opinions expressed in this blog post or content are those of the authors or the interviewees and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of any other agency, organization, employer, or company.
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